The Copy Machine

            On Tuesday he went to work as normal. The copy machine acted up during lunch break, growing tentacles that knocked papers, staplers, and things everywhere. So he stuffed the rest of his egg salad sandwich into his left cheek and turned his right forearm into an axe, chopping off all the tentacles. The severed pieces, green and blotchy, twitched and turned into sushi rolls, which he and his coworkers greedily ate the rest of the afternoon. That night as he slept the sushi-tentacles in his stomach cried out longingly. But he was very tired, so he did not hear them.