My stapler ate it?

Last night, my stapler and tape dispenser came alive and formed a mutiny. Before creeping over to my bed, taping my mouth shut and stapling the blanket tight preventing my escape, they maliciously bent the paperclips out of whack, pushed the pushpins into the ground, and ripped the post-it notes into shreds. And then they destroyed my computer. They were tired of being under appreciated. Now, who knows where they went. They may be sabotaging countless others. But I want you to know that I was the first victim. And that is why I do not have my homework today.