Conversation

“My mouth is like a vacuum.”
“Is that so?”
“A hugeass black hole vacuum.”
“You’re not sucking me in.”
“Well you’re clearly to big.”
“Calling me fat?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Look, just because of your freak show mouth – “
“My what?”
“Your crazy sucking mouth – “
“Black hole vacuum mouth is a good thing!”
“Good?”
“The best possible thing!”
“OK, explain yourself.”
“It doesn’t suck like a vacuum, it inhales, ingests.”
“You’re talking about food?”
“Picture a steak hovering between us.”
“Man you’re falling off the beaten trail. Levitating steak?”
“I’d be done before you swallowed one bite.”