Turns out Snow White wasn’t named after her fair skin. She was a cocaine addict and what they call a “crackwhore.” That explains the seven small men.
Last anyone had heard, Aladdin joined some terrorist organization and Jasmine became a sex-trafficker. The magic carpet, Abu, and the genie were all metaphors for the problems in their relationship.
Toxic waste was dumped into the ocean and the little Mermaid grew three more tails. The prince divorced her and married Ursula, who went on Jenny Craig and lost 50 lbs.
Everyone else is in rehab or dead. Or working for the DMV.
hahahaha the DMV. lara you are genius.
ReplyDeletereally funny. especially the aladdin one.
ReplyDeletedude these are pure gold. i love the three more tails and DMV quip
ReplyDelete